09guanaka

ok, so today I didn’t start so well…i keep telling myself i shouldn’t deprive myself of foods, just eat them in moderate terms, which honestly, i think i have been….but its like i have a little person inside my mind telling me that i can’t do this, i need to quit, i wont ever be “skinny”…i ate lunch and now im back here on a computer crying my eyes out just wishing that i could see some results…this realy sux….

so this week has been really bad for me…i have started feeling that depression all over again, and i have no wants to do anything at home….does anyone have any suggestions? i don’t want anyway to feel sorry for me, nor am i looking for attention, so if you feel that way while reading this, i suggest you just go ahead and stop…im trying to release any stress or downs that i may be feeling, and this is the only place i know where to do it…. you know i have realized i am in good shape…i mean i still am able to run up and down that soccer field, but i just wish my body image said the same thing…sometimes im ok, but then i look at some of the girls that play on my tieam and i guess it just gets me to thinking of all the things i should be doing to better myself….does anyone have any suggestions of what i can take as an energy booster??? you see, i do the park and ride from work, so i’m sitting in a bus for an 1 hour until we get to where our cars are…by the time i make it home im all tired and sleepy and not wanting to do anything when i get home…what can i drink what can i take what the h3** can i do for this…? i get frustrated that i dont have it in me to wanna get out there and jog or even walk, but then again i know its my fault because its all a mental thing!!! HELP

anyone who is willing to give me some feed back…im willing to give you all ears…thnx and god bless

i started thinking to myself last night, after drinking some organic chocolate milk (yumm!) that i may need just a little bit more help then i thought….so i have decided to see a doctor of natural medicine..(in spanish they are called a naturlasita, not sure if it translate the same in english) anyway, i know it will be expensive, but im thinking there, they can give me a little jumpstart to my new life change…i know the meds will help and it will probably more of a mental thing, but is that really hurting anyone anyway? the meds aren’t drugs, they are all natural meds that help, with what ever case you are suffering of…in my case lack of energy and depression…i also have hypothyroidism which really sux because i always have to be on medication ….anyway have a great 4th of July all!!!!!!!!

hello buddyslim world, I am back and I have to be honest, I have not been doing so well. I just found out that my best friend died yesterday( in a different country but the pain is still the same) so I have decided to get off my a** and feeling sorry for myself…I cant depend on anyone else to do this except for me…it kind of sux that I have to lose someone dear in my life, just for me to get that kick start, but life has its crazy tolls and life is a game, its something you have to learn to beat…so let me learn new things a long my way, because the day i am no longer breathing, i atleast want to know i was at peace with my self…..